Christmas In July

[Intro]

This week, you and me,

we will witness history

as the RNC crowns their orange manatee

[Verse 1]

We'll see wacky hats, crazy ties

worn by thousands of white guys,

An entire airplane hangar

filled with Donald Trump's ex-wives.

We'll see Newt, Ron, and Rand

maybe members of the Klan

But no Muslims or Latinos

cause I think they've all been banned!

[Chorus]

It will be crazy, you can't deny

It's like Christmas in July

...in Cleveland!

[Verse 2]

To the Quicken Loans Arena

It's the finest place you've seen-a

It can nearly fit each person

fired by Carly Fiorina

It's The Q, but let's be clear

Q doesn't stand for "queer"

though it really doesn't matter,

there aren't many of them here

[Chorus]

"Build a wall around me, dancing delegates!"

[Bridge]

And there's so much more in store

Cos it's not one night, it's four!

So...

[Verse 3]

Reince Priebus will campaign

huffing paint to ease the pain

and Paul Ryan will be crying

while Ben Carson juggles brains

Ted Cruz is drinkin' whiskey

no one's sittin' with Chris Christie

and Mitt Romney bungees in to say,

"Does anybody miss me?"

[Chorus 2]

Jeb is in the bathroom yelling, "Why?"

it's like Christmas in July

[Outro]

The party of Lincoln had better start drinkin'

it's like Christmas in July