About This Track
"The Murder Mystery" is a track by The Velvet Underground, from the album The Velvet Underground, released 1st March 1969. Full lyrics are available below.
Lyrics
[Verse 1 Left: Morrison] Candy screen wrappers of silkscreen fantastic Requiring memories Both lovely and guilt free Lurid and lovely with twilight of ages Luscious and lovely and filthy with laughter Laconic giggles Ennui fort the passions In order to justify most spurious desires Rectify moments Most serious and urgent To hail upon the face of most odious time Requiring replies most facile and vacuous With words nearly singed With the heartbeat of passions Spew forth with the grace of a tart going under Subject of great concern Noble origin [Verse 1 Right: Reed] Denigrate obtuse and active verbs pronouns Skewer the sieve of optical sewer Release the handle that holds all the gates up Puncture the eyeballs that seep all the muck up Read all the books and the people worth reading And still see the muck on the sky of the ceiling [Verse 2 Left: Tucker] Please raise the flag Rosy red carpet envy English used here Is messenger is nervous It's no fun at all Out here in the hall [Verse 2 Right: Yule] Mister moonlight Succulent smooth and gorgeous Isn't it nice? We're number One and so forth Isn't it sweet Being unique? [Verse 3 Left: Morrison] For screeching and yelling and various offenses Lower the queen and bend her over the tub Against the state, the country, the committee Hold her head under the water please for an hour For groveling and spewing and various offenses Puncture the bloat with the wing of a sparrow The inverse, the obverse, the converse, the reverse The sharpening wing of the edge of a sparrow For suitable reckonings too numerous to mention As the queen is fat she is devoured by rats There is one way to skin a cat Or poison a rat it is hetero Four hear to three forthrightly stated” [Verse 3 Right: Reed] Relent And obverse And inverse And perverse And reverse The inverse Of perverse And reverse And reverse And reverse And reverse And chop it And pluck it And cut it And spit it And sew it To joy On the edge Of a cyclops And spinet it To rage On the edge Of a cylindrical minute [Verse 4 Left: Tucker] Put down that rag Simpering, callow and morose Who let you in? If I knew, then I could get out The murder you see Is a mystery to me [Verse 4 Right: Yule] Dear Mister Muse Fellow of wit and gentry Medieval ruse Filling the shallow and empty Fools that duel Duel in pools [Verse 5 Left: Morrison] To Rembrandt and Oswald To peanuts and ketchup Sanctimonious sycophants stir in the bushes Up to the stand with your foot on the bible As king I must order and constantly arouse If you swear to catch up and throw up and up up A king full of virgin kiss me and spin it Excuse to willow and wander dark wonders Divest me of robes-sutures Harry and pig meat The fate of a nation, rests hard on your bosoms The king on his throne, puts his hand down his robe The torture of inverse and silk screen and Harry And set the tongue squealing the reverse and inverse [Verse 5 Right: Reed] Tantalize poets with visions of grandeur Their faces turn blue with the reek of the compost As the living try hard to retain what the dead lost With double dead sickness from writing at what cost And business And business And reverse And reverse And set the brain reeling The inverse And perverse [Verse 6 Left: Tucker] Objections suffice Apelike and tactile bassoon Oboeing me Cordon the virus' section Off to the left Is what is not right [Verse 6 Right: Yule] English arcane Tantamount here to frenzy Passing for me Lascivious elder passion Corpulent filth Disguised as silk [Verse 7 Left: Morrison] Contempt, contempt and contempt for the boredom I shall poison the city and sink it with fire For Cordless and Harry and Apepig and Scissor The messenger's wig seems fraught with desire For blueberry picnics and pince-nez and magpies The messenger's skirt, would you please hook it higher For children and adults all those under ninety How truly disgusting. Would you please put it down? A stray in this fray is no condom worth saving As king I'm quite just, but it's just quite impossible A robe and a robe and a robe and a bat No double class inverse could make lying worth dying [Verse 7 Right: Reed] With cheap simian melodies Hillbilly outgush For illiterate ramblings For cheap understanding For mass understanding The simple The inverse The compost The reverse The obtuse And stupid And business And business And cheap, stupid lyrics And simple mass reverse While the real thing is dying [Verse 8 Left: Tucker] Exit the pig Enter the Owl and Gorgeous King on the left It on the right and primping Adjusting his nose As he reads from his scroll [Verse 8 Right: Yule] Folksy knockwurst Peel back the skin of French and What do you find? Follicles intertwinning Succulent prose Wrapped up in robes [Verse 9 Left: Morrison] Off with his head Take his head from his neck off Requiring memories both lovely and guiltfree Put out his eyes, then cut his nose off Sanctimonious sycophants stir in the bushes Scoop out his brain Put a string where his ears were All the king's horses and all the king's men Swing the whole mess at the end of the wire Scratch out his eyes with the tip of a razor Let the wire extend from the tip of a rose Caroline, Caroline, Caroline, Oh! But retains the remnants of what once was a nose Pass me my robe Fill my bath up with water [Verse 9 Right: Reed] Jumpsuit and pig meat And making his fortune While making them happy With the inverse and obverse And making them happy And making them happy With the coy and the stupid Just another dumb lackey Who puts out one thing While singing the other But the real thing's alone And it is no man's brother [Verse 10 Left: Tucker] No one knows No nose is good news and senseless Extend the wine Drink here, a toast to selfless Ten year old port Is perfect in court [Verse 10 Right: Yule] Safety is nice Not an unwise word spoken Scary, bad dreams Made safe in lovely songs No doom or gloom Allowed in this room [Verse 11 Left: Morrison] Casbah and Cascade and Rosehip and Feeling Cascade and Cyanide, Rachaminoff, Beethoven Skull silly wagon and justice and perverse And reverse the inverse and inverse and inverse Blueberry catalog, questionable earnings Hustler's lament and the rest will in due cry To battle and scramble and browbeat and hurt While chewing on minstrels and choking on dirt Disease please seems the order of the day Please the king, please the king, please the king day Casbah and Cascade and Rosehip and Feeling Point of order return the king here to the ceiling [Verse 11 Right: Reed] Oh, not to be whistled Or studied or hummed or Remembered at nights When the I is alone But to skewer and ravage And savage and split With the grace of a diamond, bellicose wit To stun and to stagger with words as such stone That those who do hear cannot again return home [Verse 12 Left: Tucker] Razzamatazz There's nothing on my shoulder Lust is a must Shaving my head's made me bolder Will you kindly read What it was I brought thee [Verse 12 Right: Yule] Hello to Ray Hello to Godiva and Angel Who let you in? Isn't it nice The party? Aren't the lights Pretty at night? [Verse 13 Left: Morrison] Sick leaf and sorrow and pincers not scissors Regard and refrain from the daughters of marriage Regards for the elders and youngest in carriage Regard and regard for the inverse and perverse And obverse, and diverse, of reverse and reverse Regard from the sick, the dumb, and the camel From pump's storing water, like brain is to marrow X-ray and filthy and cutting and then peeling To skin and to skin and to bone and to structure To livid and pallid and turgid and structured And structured and structured and structured and structured And regard and refrain, and regard and refrain The sick and the dumb, inverse, reverse and perverse [Verse 13 Right: Reed] Contempt, contempt, and contempt for the seething For writhing and reeling and two-bit reportage For sick with the body and sinister holy The drown burst blue babies now dead on the seashore The valorous horseman, who hang from the ceiling The pig on the carpet, the dusty pale jissom That has no effect for the sick with the see-saw The inverse, obverse, converse, reverse of inverse The diverse and converse of reverse and perverse And sweet pyrotechnics, and let's have another Of inverse, converse, diverse, perverse and reverse Hell's graveyard is damned as they chew on their brains The slick and the scum, reverse, inverse and perverse [Verse 14 Left: Yule] Plowing while it's done away Dumb and ready pig meat Sick upon the carpet Climb into the casket Safe within the parapet Sack is in the parapet Pigs are out and growling Slaughter by the seashore See the lifeguard drowning Sea is full of fishes Fishes full of china China plates are falling All fall down Sick and shiny carpet Lie before my eyes-eyes Lead me to the ceiling Walk upon the wall-wall Tender as the green grass Drink the whisky horror See the young girls dancing Flies upon the beaches Beaches are for sailors Nuns across the sea-wall Black hood horseman raging Swordsman eating fire Fire on the carpet Set the house ablazing Seize and bring it flaming Gently to the ground-ground Dizzy Bell Miss Fortune Fat and full of love-juice Drip it on the carpet Down below the fire hose Weep and whisky fortune Sail me to the moon, dear Drunken dungeon sailors Headless Roman horsemen The king and queen are empty Their heads are in the outhouse Fish upon the water Bowl upon the saviour Toothless wigged Laureate Plain and full of fancy Name upon a letterhead Impressing all the wheat germ Love you for a nickel Maul you for a quarter Set the casket flaming Do not go gentle blazing [Verse 14 Right: Reed] Sick upon the staircase Sick upon the pulpit Blood upon the pillow Climb into the parapet See the church bells gleaming Knife that scrapes a sick plate Dentures full of air holes The tailor couldn't mend straight Shoot her full of air holes Climbing up the casket Take me to the casket Teeth upon her red throat Screw me in the daisies Rip upon her holler Snip the seas fantastic Treat her like a sailor Full and free and nervous Out to make his fortune Either this or that way Sickly or in good health Piss upon a building Like a dog in training Teach to heel or holler Yodel on a sing song Down upon the carpet Tickle polyester Sick within the parapet Screwing for a dollar Sucking on a fire-hose Chewing on a rubber line Tied to chairs and rarebits Pay another player Oh you're such a good lad Here's another dollar Tie him to the bedpost Sick with witches' covens Craving for a raw meat Bones upon the metal Sick upon the circle Down upon the carpet Down below the parapet Waiting for your bidding Pig upon the carpet Tumenescent railroad Neuro-anaesthesia analog Ready for a good look Drooling at the birches Swinging from the birches Succulent Nebraska
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