Fireworks

[Verse 1]

It’s hard to be living

You gotta play the cards you were given

You think it’s simple but it goddamn isn’t

It’s tougher now than breaking out of Shawshank prison

And as you’re hittin your prime

People say you been committing a crime

But I won’t quit till I’m home

I’ll chip the limestone a bit at a time

Wait! I’m a pale ass pale middle-class straight white male

I won’t have an alibi the day I fail

Cause if I ever went to jail, Mom would pay my bail

In a [boom-boom] heartbeat

Mom and Dad have given me a lot more than a pat on the back

And I gotta thank ‘em for loving me

From the moment I was strapped in a Volvo car seat

When I needed a pep talk

I couldn’t remember to wreck shop

Writer’s block, staring at my laptop desktop

Or sleeping in my rental in a turnpike rest stop

Shit in storage, living from a suitcase

Thinking “this is how a silver spoon tastes?”

Cause you can make a dream possible

But it’ll never be easy, no matter what you chase

If you wanna poke fun then do so

I’ll do it for you, it’s no crime

I’m like if the dude from Juno grew a Jewfro and liked to rhyme [OOoooooohhh!!!]

So tell me that I’m not a rapper

Tell Rudolph he can’t pull sleighs

Tell Pluto it’s not a planet

And he’ll probably keep spinning in the same old way

On and on, every day

Right around the sun, wanna feel the rays

You do it ‘cause you love it like nothing else in the universe

And fuck it, it’s embedded in your DNA

[Outro Skit]

Boom! It was really loud. I mean, seriously loud. Boom! Boom! Boom!

Were you scared?

I'm probably like... I'm probably like the one who was getting scared like... Ten times... more often... Then anybody else I know!

I think people that say that they're not scared are lying about not being scared

Yeah... So is people saying that they're not ticklish