Gentleman

[Verse 1] This old middle finger Has grown fat and tired from flicking the bird My mouth has grown cankerous From spitting dirty words I feel like a strung out Snuffaluffagus On the south side wearing Vietnamese cowboy clothes And I found out the hard way that the pathway to her heart Is not through her nose [Chorus] I'm tired of being rude, ticked-off drunk and crude My woman can't bring me home to ma 'cause I am the dude I'm tired of swigging this beer, need to wipe off this ugly sneer My woman can't bring me home to pa 'cause I am too weird [Post-Chorus] And she wants a gentleman Nothing more, just a gentle friend [Verse 2] It's getting hard to lie through my teeth 'Cause they rotted out and they're not all there I need my old man to wash my mouth out with soap And my mother to scrub this nasty hair Why the fuck is a munchkin on the highway Jumping out a trash can in Congolese cowboy clothes? And like a deer transfixed by headlights The bumper crushed his head while I God damn froze [Chorus] I'm tired of being rude, ticked-off drunk and crude My woman can't bring me home to ma 'cause I am the dude I'm tired of swigging this beer, need to wipe off this ugly sneer My woman can't bring me home to pa 'cause I am too weird I'm tired of being rude, ticked-off, drunk and crude My woman can't bring me home to ma 'cause I am the dude I'm tired of swigging this beer, need to wipe off this ugly sneer My woman can't bring me home to pa 'cause I am too queer [Refrain] And she wants a gentleman Nothing more, just gentle friend Nothing less than a gentleman Nothing more, just a gentleman Nothing less than a gentle friend Nothing more, just a gentleman Nothing less than a gentleman Than a gentleman Than a gentleman, a gentleman A gentleman, a gentleman [Outro] Yahoo Aw, yeah, aw, yeah C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, yeah, yeah Just a gentleman Just a gentle friend C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, yeah, yeah Yeah, yeah Just a gentleman Ooh-ooh Ooh-ooh Yeah, yeah, woah Just a gentle friend, just a gentle friend Just a gentleman C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon Yeah, yeah-yeah Ahh Yeah-yeah, yeah-yeah Yeah-yeah