Gentleman

[Verse 1]

This old middle finger

Has grown fat and tired from flicking the bird

My mouth has grown cankerous

From spitting dirty words

I feel like a strung out Snuffaluffagus

On the south side wearing Vietnamese cowboy clothes

And I found out the hard way that the pathway to her heart

Is not through her nose

[Chorus]

I'm tired of being rude, ticked-off drunk and crude

My woman can't bring me home to ma 'cause I am the dude

I'm tired of swigging this beer, need to wipe off this ugly sneer

My woman can't bring me home to pa 'cause I am too weird

[Post-Chorus]

And she wants a gentleman

Nothing more, just a gentle friend

[Verse 2]

It's getting hard to lie through my teeth

'Cause they rotted out and they're not all there

I need my old man to wash my mouth out with soap

And my mother to scrub this nasty hair

Why the fuck is a munchkin on the highway

Jumping out a trash can in Congolese cowboy clothes?

And like a deer transfixed by headlights

The bumper crushed his head while I God damn froze

[Chorus]

I'm tired of being rude, ticked-off drunk and crude

My woman can't bring me home to ma 'cause I am the dude

I'm tired of swigging this beer, need to wipe off this ugly sneer

My woman can't bring me home to pa 'cause I am too weird

I'm tired of being rude, ticked-off, drunk and crude

My woman can't bring me home to ma 'cause I am the dude

I'm tired of swigging this beer, need to wipe off this ugly sneer

My woman can't bring me home to pa 'cause I am too queer

[Refrain]

And she wants a gentleman

Nothing more, just gentle friend

Nothing less than a gentleman

Nothing more, just a gentleman

Nothing less than a gentle friend

Nothing more, just a gentleman

Nothing less than a gentleman

Than a gentleman

Than a gentleman, a gentleman

A gentleman, a gentleman

[Outro]

Yahoo

Aw, yeah, aw, yeah

C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, yeah, yeah

Just a gentleman

Just a gentle friend

C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, yeah, yeah

Yeah, yeah

Just a gentleman

Ooh-ooh

Ooh-ooh

Yeah, yeah, woah

Just a gentle friend, just a gentle friend

Just a gentleman

C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon

Yeah, yeah-yeah

Ahh

Yeah-yeah, yeah-yeah

Yeah-yeah