English Language

English Language (English Language) We’ve all had enough of you making it Tough for us all to pronounce you (how to pronounce you) You need to pick a frickin’ lane With the sounds you’re making Like ‘ough’ it’s said how it’s spelt Oogh? Psych! It’s oh, ow, oo, or, off, uff, uck or up What the fuck is up with that? (I'm so confused) English lan-gua-gey (English lan-gua-gey) We’ve all had enoo of you making it Too for us to pro no-un-kay (pro no-un-kay) It feels like you’re just taking the P Out of pterodactyl to fuck with us Let’s talk about queue That sounds already the first letter so What’s with the extra ‘ueue’? (q-way-u-way) Are we just adding any old shit To the endings of words now? In that case I’ll have the fish and chips And a packet of prawn cocktail crisps Yеs, the dollar sign is silent Oh, the hyphеn? No That’s pronounced gibberish English Lan-jua-jey (English Lan-jua-jey) We’ve all had e now of you making It tou for us to pro-shin-u la-sey (pro-shin-u la-sey) Why is the plural of mouse mice But we can’t live in semi-detached hice? If you keep on laughing at me You’re gonna drive me to commit manslaughter And don’t even get me started On the place names Cholmondeley? Happisburgh? Woolfardisworthy? Oh, screw this, I’m moving to France Oh sweet Jesus