Featured Singer

I wanna be the featured singer on an EDM song
A song that is a paean to human potential
And when they put on my song, DJs all around the world will say
"Come on, let me feel your energy"

I wanna be the featured singer on an EDM song
The one they play at parties on fraternity row
The one that uplifts your spirit and bothers your roommate
And throbs, throbs, throbs through the walls of the warehouse

I wanna be the featured singer on an EDM song
Wedding DJs will cringe when it is requested
Spin Magazine, The Needle Drop, and Reader's Digest won't even review it
But kids will choreograph elaborate dances to my voice on TikTok

Aah aah, aah aah
Aah aah, aah
Aah aah, aah aah
Aah aah, aah

I wanna be the featured singer on an EDM song
No one will march to it in the streets looking for a brighter day
But ukelele covers of it will crowd your YouTube suggestions
And Art Laboe will send it out with a dedication to a dog named Snuggles

I wanna be the featured singer on an EDM song
It's the role I was born to play: completely faceless, but for a few months I will be everywhere
Uplifting your spirit, bothering your roommate
I will throb, throb, throb through the walls of the warehouse

Now turn on your phone light and wave it around
Now turn on your phone light and wave it around
Turn on your phone light and wave it around
No problem, you can Venmo me back later for the ketamine, Diane, did you know this stuff was made for horses?

Aah aah, aah aah
Aah aah, aah
Aah aah, aah aah
Aah aah, aah
(Everybody now!)

I wanna be the featured singer on an EDM song
I wanna be the featured singer on an EDM song
I wanna be the featured singer on an EDM song
Come on, let me feel your energy