Phone message: For hot girls, press zero now. And if something comes up while you're waiting, hold tight. Please wait
Phone operator: Morning, would you like to speak to a girl?
Jeff: Hello, um, I would like to have a little bit of phone sex please
Operator: what is your name?
Jeff: My name's David. I'm not being charged to talk to you am I?
Operator: No
Jeff: All right. I mean you seem like a nice guy but I thought I'd like to talk to a girl. Ha, you know?
Operator: How do you wish to pay for this?
Jeff: Well, uh, what would be my billing options, sir?
Operator: Visa, Mastercard, check
Jeff: Jack? What would Jack-
Operator: Check
Jeff: Oh, oh, check. All right. Visa, Masterc- well, I got me a Visa card, sir
Operator: Okay, what is your phone number?
Jeff: All right, well, let me find my damn Visa. You want my number, sir?
Operator: One of the girls can call you back
Jeff: Oh, I see, I see. Well, now you don't need my full name do you?
Operator: Yes I do
Jeff: Oh . . . well . .
Operator: As well as your address
Jeff: Oh, well, see, I wouldn't want my wife to find out about this, see. She's out of town now but you know y'all wouldn't be sending me no pornographic pictures would you?
Operator: No
Jeff: Okay. See, my wife wouldn't approve of me getting into some phone sex. Now sir, can I ask you just a couple of questions about your service?
Operator: Okay, just a moment
Jeff: All right
. . .
Jeff: Hello? Hello, sir?
Operator: Yes, hello?
Jeff: Yes? What did you say?
Operator: What is your last name?
Jeff: Oh . . . Dunkin. You're not gonna send no pornographic pictures?
Operator: What is your number?
Jeff: Well, sir, I wanted to ask you some questions about your service
Operator: Go ahead
Jeff: First, well, you see I'm, well . . . is it pretty much anything goes?
Operator: Anything you want to talk about with the girls
Jeff: Yeah, well, I got some kinda weird things I'm into though. I kinda like, uh, like, cows. Is cows okay?
Operator: Cows?
Jeff: Yeah, I'm into cows
Operator: I don't understand
Jeff: Well, it'd be like me and her and a cow
Operator: Whatever you wanna talk about, it's okay
Jeff: That's, that's beautiful. I love America. Now my wife ain't gonna find out about this is she?
Operator: No
Jeff: Because she don't know about cows
READ MORE ABOUT NEUTRAL MILK HOTEL
