Who the Fuck Is Alice

Sally called when she got the word
And she said, "I suppose you've heard... about Alice?"
When I rushed to the window and I looked outside
And I could hardly believe my eyes
As a big limousine rolled up, into Alice's drive
Oh, I don't know why she's leaving
Or where she's gonna go
I guess she's got her reasons
But I just don't want to know
'Cause for 24 years
I've been living next door to Alice
Alice, Who The Fuck is Alice!
24 years just waiting for a chance
To tell her how I feel, and maybe get a second glance
Now I've got to get used to not living next door to Alice
Alice, Who The Fuck is Alice!
We grew up together, two kids in the park
We carved our initials, deep in the bark
Me and Alice
Now she walks through the door, with her head held high
Just for a moment, I caught her eye
As a big limousine pulled slowly, out of Alice's drive
Oh, I don't know why she's leaving
Or where she's gonna go
I guess she's got her reasons
But I just don't want to know
'Cause for 24 years
I've been living next door to Alice
Alice, Who The Fuck is Alice!
24 years just waiting for a chance
To tell her how I feel, and maybe get a second glance
Now I gotta get used to not living next door to Alice
Alice, Who The Fuck is Alice!
And Sally called back and asked how I felt
And she said, "I know how to help
Get over Alice"
She said, "Now Alice is gone, but I'm still here"
You know I've been waiting for 24 years
And a big limousine disappeared
I don't know why she's leaving
Or where she's gonna go
I guess she's got her reasons
But I just don't want to know
'Cause for 24 years
I've been living next door to Alice
Alice, Who The Fuck is Alice!
24 years just waiting for a chance
To tell her how I feel, and maybe get a second glance
But I'll never get used to not living next door to Alice
No, I'll never get used to not living next door to Alice