tourniquet.

Tie this tourniquet
Pull it tight around my neck
Just fucking clip the pressure
Cut the circulation
Till my body rejects

You know I still have that bullet
The one with your named carved through it
It's never left my head
Even it pains me to just admit it

I still think about you
Everyday
It kills me to say
I still wish things differently
When suddenly everything changed

And I can't get used to the fact
That nothing ever seems to last
And what doesn't kill you
Just becomes trauma that we mask
Things we wanna keep buried
But seems we'll nеver get past

I keep letting it in
And pouring it out
For thе world to see
All of my doubts

I don't trust myself
I only blame myself
Despite how much time has passed
It still hurts like hell

Don't say I didn't love you
Cause it hurt like hell when I left you
Lost in limbo and filling the void

I let my guard down
I poured my heart out
I put my faith into you
Calloused and reduced
To a lesser version of who I once was
Getting burned by those that you love
Sick to death of biting my tongue
Blaming myself for all that you've done

Tie this tourniquet
Pull it tight around my neck
Just fucking clip the pressure
Cut the circulation
Till my body rejects
I've got this hemorrhage in my head
Can it be fixed?
Or will I wind up dead?
I guess only time will tell
But I'd do anything to help me forget
What was left of us, honestly?
Ask yourself, did you ever really love me?
Was anything fucking worth it?
Ask yourself

It'll never make sense
The people closest to you
Always hurt you in the end
It'll never make sense
The people closest to you
Wanna see you dead