[Round 1: Backstreet Boys' Nick Carter]
There's an old saying that you're the dumbest in your youth
Whoever said that must have met Charlie Puth
But he can't be that dumb, 'cause he's a decent songwriter
But it's almost like if Macklemore just magically got whiter
I saw you on YouTube, you had me in tears
You covered Adele, and Adele covered her ears
We'll have you runnin', man, I hope you're an athlete
'Cause, dude, you just went down the wrong backstreet
[Round 1: Charlie Puth]
Now I'm a bit confused, 'cause I'm probably young
But someone please explain to me how Nick was the cute one
But in 2017, that sounds quite bizarre
You look like David Beckham if he lived in his car
At one point you went solo, I know you were tryin'
But your songs just sounded like a German Shepherd dyin'
A hundred million Backstreet fans can't be wrong
But a hundred million Backstreet fans can be moms, Nick
[Round 2: Backstreet Boys' Brian Littrell & Howie D.]
Our fans are moms, and it's not that bad
The '90s were crazy, Charlie, I could be your dad
You're a knock-off like Ed Sheeran had a child
You have no direction, you're like Harry with no Styles
Your song's called "How Long," and if you're asking us
I mean, your career, well, it's been long enough
But congrats on your success, enjoy it while you're young
But when you get home, just Google William Hung
[Round 2: Charlie Puth]
I know in '98, you were treated like gods
Yet 20 years later, you're the king of the dad bod
I heard you're making bank now as Vegas headliners
But how much of that's wasted on AJ's guyliner?
And I hate to say that you guys aren't aging well
But how'd you go from Howie D. to Howie Mandel?
You should stop rapping, you're just making noise
Imagine being 45 and still being called "The Boys"
[Round 3: Backstreet Boys' AJ McLean & Kevin Richardson]
This Charlie Puth, yeah, he sure is somethin'
You look like if mayonnaise had sex with McLovin
This is our time, so follow the leader
You're not just a wannabe, you're a wanna-Bieber
That's right
You were signed by Ellen off of YouTube
Does your contract say you have to look like her, too?
We all know your music, but let me just say
Tell me why, Charlie
[Backstreet Boys]
Why won't you go away?
[Charlie Puth]
Okay, that's not fair! That's not fair. You're playing with my heartstrings, because I'm mad at you, you're being mean to me, but I like that song
[Howie D.]
Thank you, I think
[Charlie Puth]
Joshua, give me something like this...
[Howie D.]
That's not gonna get you points. That's not gonna get you extra points, alright?
[Beatboxer Josh Silverstein matches Charlie Puth's beat]
[Charlie Puth]
You got me?
[Round 3: Charlie Puth]
Yeah, stop pretending, you guys, you don't wanna beat me
I know you did this show so your daughters could meet me
Look at you two, I can't hold back in laughter
You look like a photo of "before" and "after"
My mom wants an autograph, but as you can see
She stole my Sharpie so he could have his goatee
Tried five on one, but I'm sending you home
Whose idea was a boy band of all Joey Fatones?
