My Crumpet

That's the end
And you can't help believing
That all he was wanting
Was someone to talk with
To talk through his problems
Hey, are you alone tonight?
I thought i saw a light
In your pantry, my crumpet
You see i won't get a lay tonight
Instead i'm satisfied
To think of spa treatment lives instead
The pursuit of cane sugar
And the inevitable death
And the comfort of a sofa-bed
Of course i'm far from over it
Promise me another lonely year and i'll bend over
Because sadly, i am still here
And i'm watching my days disappear