Hello Mama

Hello?

Hello, Mama, this is Osama

I'm in a geisha house in Yokohama

I swear I don't know nothing 'bout no tennis shoe bomb

I'm a nervous wreak, Dubya's breathin' down my neck

Goodness me, mercy sakes

Listen, son, what on Earth are you thinking?

I don't know

Tell me something, have you been drinking?

No! I ain't been drinking

This ain't no way to behave

You're gonna send me to my grave!

Hold it, Mama! You know I can't talk long at all

Dubya just might trace this call

Wait a minute, uh-oh!

We will not tire, we will not fail

However long it takes you know we will prevail

Mercy sakes

Mama, I don't wanna go to Guantanamo

So Mama, send me some dough

Another hundred million or so

I think it's worse than dead broke down in Guantanamo

Hello?

Hello, Mama, this is "Usama"

I'm in a mud hut in the middle of Uganda

Now here's the thing, I changed my name to "Usama"

Yeah, 'cause Dubya's nipping at my heels

Now I know how Salman Rushdie feels

Goodness me, mercy sakes

Listen, son, I'm not trying to upset you

I know

But honey, if they do catch you

Oh, for goodness sakes, bite your tongue!

You know it's every mother's prayer

You have on clean underwear

Hold it, Mama! Dubya just won't leave me alone

I think he might have tapped this phone

Wait a minute, uh-oh!

We will not tire, we will not fail

Do not pass go, just go directly to jail

Goodness me!

Mama, I don't wanna go to Guantanamo

So Mama, send me some dough

Another hundred million or so

I think it's worse than dead broke down in Guantanamo