Armitage Shanks

[No I have no ambition to continue on in that field

But I couldn't care less

I just get off what I do

And I do it very well

Thank you, I know

This is why I'm not tolerated

I can't be bothered to tell a lie

There has been something as revolutionary as the Sex Pistols: the ongoing force of ME

And this is something you cannot forget]

Toilet, Toilet

I was wanking her off the other day

And she's pulling a really strange face

These things happen in situations like this, so I carried on

Made her cum all over the place

Then she tells me, that she was imagining me to be a complete stranger

Well thanks a fucking lot, nice one, lovely

Next time then darling

I'll tip up to yours, wearing a mask and postmans uniform

Leave the door unlocked

Just bend over

And I'll shove it up your arse

Throw a few letters on the floor

Just for added effect

Bob's your uncle, theres your random sex

Seven knackered fridges dumped on a piece of wasteland

Next to a house thats burning bridges, with all its neighbours

Twenty-five kids sharing two rooms, ASDA Smart Price

The bus stop's a youth club

Soveriegn cigarettes and mushrooms

Well what are you saying bro?

Would you like a drink? I'll go!

I hear you're the toast of the town

Can I kiss your arsehole?

You don't tell my bird you wanna fuck her

You fucking leave it Michael

You don't say nothing

Sexual encounters like that take a while

Shes gotta get her head round the fact that you're a fat bastard with ginger hair

That's no offence to people with ginger hair

But I wouldn't want it

I'm sick of being talked down to

By desperate blokes in maharishi smoke pants

That shit went down in Scaramanga

We salute you!

Well what are you saying bro?

Would you like a drink? I'll go!

I hear you're the toast of the town

Can I kiss your arsehole?

Another do

I've been invited to that many do's over the last six months

By people who didn't want to know me eight months ago

Makes you sick

I wouldn't mind

But 98% of the music in this city is fucking shit

Armitage shanks, a toilet fucking culture

And if you're not getting your arse shagged

Then you're the phanton bummer

You've heard it all before

You're gonna hear it all again

Well what do you think I'm gonna sing about

My endless love?

You fucking freak

I'd rather die in the gutter darling forget about it

What d'you do man?

When you're on your last legs

And you ain't got a plan

Your sheets are all covered in blood stains

Bruises on your thighs

Shagging the right bird

Your beds surrounded by beer cans

And empty chisel bags

Knangled by your teeth trying to get at the fucking rock that's melting underneath

I'm a vampire

I've got homemade fangs

I make Shane Macgowan look like cross between Joe Collins and Karl Lagerfield

With his fan

Messy fucker, messy fucker

That stained your life

It's upstated mine

I've got oil on my ladder

It's on there all the time

{​​What about Wayne Fontana? he did it..}​​

Living off your wits is just a toilet seat