Antifreeze and Chocolate Biscuits

[Verse 1]

Lose our morals each December

Promise each year we'll be better

All our good intentions forgotten like an extra

Bottle of Lynx shower gel that I didn't even ask for and Auntie Val's given me again

[Pre-Chorus]

Relatives come out the woodwork

Carol singers make my head hurt

Death by cringe John Lewis adverts

[Chorus]

At Christmas

Since the magic has faded, everybody gets wasted

At Christmas

When you're crying to Slade with your sad Tinder date

At the annual office party

We're all just desperate, aren't we?

At Christmas

At Christmas

[Verse 2]

Granny's tipsy on the good wine

We're all arguing by lunchtime

Call me ungrateful, I got a mug from James

That looks suspiciously like the one we gave him last year, what a joke

[Pre-Chorus]

Relatives come out the woodwork

Carol singers make my head hurt

Death by cringe John Lewis adverts

[Chorus]

At Christmas

Since the magic has faded, everybody gets wasted

At Christmas

When you're crying to Slade with your sad Tinder date

At the annual office party

We're all just desperate, aren't we?

At Christmas

At Christmas

[Bridge]

Dead mistletoe, scrap in Tesco

Dad burnt the roast, bad cracker joke

Omnibus soaps, mince pies are gross

All of our hopes lost in the post

Transport is a no-go

Bought my presents from the Esso

Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas

Here's some antifreeze and chocolate biscuits

You shouldn't have

You actually shouldn't have

[Chorus]

At Christmas

Since the magic has faded, everybody gets wasted

At Christmas

When you're crying to Slade with your sad Tinder date

At the annual office party

We're all just desperate, aren't we?

At Christmas

At Christmas

[Outro]

At Christmas