[Spoken]
(Thank you) Yeah!
(Drum solo!) Drum solo!
Mr. Phil Rott, thank you
Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Phil Rott
Alright, here's a song that we actually know
And uh, we actually made it up
So, I hope you actually enjoy it
And it goes actually like this
[Verse 1]
Happy with no teeth
I'm happy here in hibernation
Slurpin' on a peach
I'm starin' at the situation
There's a kitty at my foot
He's meowin' out this conversation
Rockin' back 'n' forth
'Cause that's my only destination
[Chorus]
I'm an old man on the back porch, old man on the back porch
Old man on the back porch, and that old man is me
Old man on the back porch, old man on the back porch
Old man on the back porch, and that
[Post-Chorus]
Sing it, yeah!
[Verse 2]
Got a two-string on my lappy
It's total subsonic vacation
There's a chicken on the drums
He's poundin' out this perfect prescription
There's twenty little worms
All plug into amplification
Fifteen hundred bass drum luggin' bug-eyed monkeys
All arrivin' at the station
[Chorus]
I'm an old man on the back porch, old man on the back porch
Old man on the back porch, and that old man is me
Old man on the back porch, old man on the back porch
Old man on the back porch, and that
[Post-Chorus]
Yeah, woo-hoo!
Oh, oh
Alright, woo-hoo!
[Bridge]
I'm old, I'm an old man
I took all my money
And I bought myself a little shacky-condominium
Outside of Syndey, Australia
'Cause I decided to retire here in Australia
'Cause it's so gosh-damn beatuiful
I love it so tenderly, so much, it's just like home
Oh, so out now from underneath the trees
Come a bunch of little chickies
And the buggies and the monkeys
With the one-string, no-string string, two-string guitars
Say, "Hey Chris wanna jam?" Sure, why not!
[Chorus]
Old man on the back porch, old man on the back porch
Old man on the back porch, and that old man is me, me!
Old man on the back porch, old man on the back porch
Old man on the back porch, and that
[Outro]
Ooh, oo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
Ah, yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah!