This Ain't Hawaii

[Verse 1] The girls are on the beach in their string bikinis The guys are strutting, proudly showing off their weenies Top 40 garbage spewing from expensive radios As they primp their pampered bodies and put schnozz-guard on their nose [Chorus] This ain't Hawaii This ain't Hawaii This ain't Hawaii [Verse 2] Prep school blondes and musclemen with perfect heinies There's more money on this beach than all the tea in China The girls all look like Nancy Drew, the boys like Jim McMahon Their fat, white, ugly parents look like Morey Amsterdam [Chorus] This ain't Hawaii This ain't Hawaii This ain't Hawaii [Drum break] [Verse 3] In droves they hit the beach in Porches and Ferraris The sun has cooked their brain, they're on a surf safari The lake is full of creepy snobs, I start to get annoyed This isn't Honolulu, dummy, this is Illinois [Chorus] This ain't Hawaii This ain't Hawaii This ain't Hawaii [Outro] They're surfing in Wilmette They're surfing in Wilmette They're surfing in Wilmette They're surfing in Wilmette