The History of Everything (Theme from The Big Bang Theory)"

Our whole universe was in a hot dense state

Then nearly fourteen billion years ago, expansion started

Wait-

The Earth began to cool

The autotrophs began to drool

Neanderthals developed tools

We built a wall (we built the pyramids)

Math, science, history, unraveling the mystery

That all started with the big bang (bang!)

"Since the dawn of man" is really not that long

As every galaxy was formed in less time than it takes to sing this song

A fraction of a second, and the elements were made

The bipeds stood up straight

The dinosaurs all met their fate

They tried to leap but they were late

And they all died (they froze their asses off!)

The oceans and Pangaea

See ya wouldn't wanna be ya

Set in motion by the same big bang

It all started with the big... bang!

It's expanding ever outward but one day

It will pause and start to go the other way

Collapsing ever inward, we won't be here, it won't be heard

Our best and brightest figure that it'll make an even bigger bang!

Australopithecus would really have been sick of us

Debating how we're here, they're catching deer (we're catching viruses)

Religion or astronomy (Descartes or Deuteronomy)

It all started with the big bang

Music and mythology, Einstein and astrology

It all started with the big bang

It all started with the big... bang!