Blood Sandwich

[Verse 1]

Yup! Steps up to the plate

Little brother, Little League, '87—he was eight

Rookie season for the skinny slugger newly out of T-ball

Pit against a pitcher with a ripper you could eat off

Church, then a grip of loons run to third first

Granny yelling, "Go Cubs!", nose in her word-search

Seen MILFs like apes on a monolithic bleacher

Into advocating war and peace in lieu of sport and leisure

"Hi, Peggy!" I was 10, chewing on a Sweet Tart

Little brother, left field, queen's guard, mean arm

Knees bent, two out, two on bags

When I caught him staring down at something moving through the grass

Hold up; tagged runner, and the whole cast rotate

Not before he could identify the culprit

Granny yelling, "Go Cubs!" Graham yelling, "Gopher!"

New left fielder give a fuck about a homer

Got a homie, little rodent, head and shoulders out his hovel

No baseball in the bubble, ruh-roh

Parents thought it adorable, the players followed suit

Inning crawling to a close, head coach not amused

Coach seeing red, coach on the diamond

Dragging 27 inches of aluminum behind him

When he transverse third, the families turn nervous

The following is a transcript of "Man vs. Vermin"

Here we go: man stands out by a hole

Pest pops up to patrol

Man plays live Whac-a-Mole

In a scene that would try every child as adults

Whoa, pall-bore with a ball mitt

Thrown over the fence, coach hit the bench

Both teams lose, "Good game, good game"

Granny yelling "Go Cubs!" Cubs ain't playing

[Bridge 1]

My little brother is a funny dude

A lot of funny shit happened to him

My other brother pretty funny, too

Ain't seen him in a minute, though

[Chorus]

The one, the— Th—Th—The one, the—

Th—The one, the— The one, the two, the three

Just in case of rough waters

I want to put one up for my brothers

Th—The one, the— Th—Th—The one, the—

Th—The one, the— The one, the—the two, the three

Just in case of rough waters

I want to put one up for my brothers

[Verse 2]

Yup! Not a part of the machine

Big brother, big idea, '9-0, 16

Neubauten tee, plaid flannel-laden, adolescent art kid

Tony Hawk hair, Skinny Puppy denim

And a record player vomiting Alien Sex Fiend, Peel Sessions

In a Christian home for field testing

It's real youth in the palm of your hand

When your mom thinks Satan is involved in a band

We were buried in the Village Voice, checking who was playing where

Pulled his head up out the paper, pushing out a single tear

Five words, like a beacon of light in the mist:

"Ministry live at the Ritz"

It was "Christ Has Risen" to Chris, three loaves, two fish

Miracle of mechanized loops on two-inch

Coming to a theater—he would be there in the flesh

Moms didn't say "No," but she didn't say "Yes"

Cop tickets—ah, the plot thickens

Countdown to ultimate concert experience

Ma still wary: "And why are they called Ministry?

Are they a cult?" Maybe she would probably investigate

Bought a mag with an Al Jourgensen interview

Read a couple sentences, glanced at a pic or two or three

That's all—no fair trial

Simply, "You will not be going to the show, and that's final!"

What occurred next were the top of the lungs

Of a son who, unjustly, had lost what he loved

In a moment that would transcend anger to high art

Said, "This is something I am willing to die for!"

Can you even imagine?

A death in the fam from industrial fandom?

Anyway, no body count, no concert

And Chris kicked rocks in his mismatched Converse

[Bridge 2]

My older brother is a funny dude

A lot of funny shit happened to him

We hadn't spoken in a couple moons

I called him last night: "How you doing?"

[Chorus]

The one the— Th—Th—The one, the—

Th—The one, the— the two, the three

Just in case of rough waters

I want to put one up for my brothers

Th—The one, th— The one, the

The one, the— th—the— the two— two, the three

Just in case of rough waters

I want to put one up for my brothers

[Outro]

The one the— Th—Th—The one, the—

Th—The one, the— the two, the three