Nan, You're A Window Shopper (Demo)

[Intro]

The bottom feels so much better than the top!

So much better

[Chorus]

Nan, you're a window shopper

Taking a look, but you never buy

Nan, you're a window shopper

You won't pick it up if it's over a fiver

Nan, you're a window shopper

Get on the bus 'cause you still can't drive

Nan, you're a window shopper

Mad as fuck, only just alive

[Verse 1]

Get up in the morning and you like your tea milky

You fumble for your glasses 'cause without them, you can't see

It's funny how I come round your house and I'm 20

And I still have to wear all the presents you sent me

I walk into your kitchen, everything's got a label

You done your Christmas shopping and we're only in April

And you won't leave the house unless you're wearing your thermals

You're covered all in cat hair and you're stinking like Strepsils

You're heading down the Bowl's Club

Have another orange squash

Balls are rollin', rollin', rollin'

You can't walk right 'cause things aren't what they were

Your ankles are swollen, swollen, swollen

[Chorus]

Nan, you're a window shopper

Taking a look, but you never buy

Nan, you're a window shopper

You won't pick it up if it's over a fiver

Nan, you're a window shopper

Get on the bus 'cause you still can't drive

Nan, you're a window shopper

Mad as fuck, only just alive

[Verse 2]

You're walking down the post office to pick up your pension

And then you're off to Bingo, it's become an obsession

So weary of the kids when they're wearing their hoods up

And even if they smile at you, you think it's a stick-up

You only buy the paper just to cut out the coupons

You're saving 50p, but what do you want with tampons?

You're always at the doctor picking up your prescription

And they throw in some K-Y just to ease up the friction

You got a leak in your colostomy bag

Yeah, it's got a hole in, hole in, hole in

At the weekend you're shopping with your trolley

It's sad how you're rollin', rollin', rollin'

[Chorus]

Nan, you're a window shopper

Taking a look, but you never buy

Nan, you're a window shopper

You won't pick it up if it's over a fiver

Nan, you're a window shopper

Get on the bus 'cause you still can't drive

Nan, you're a window shopper

Mad as fuck, only just alive