My British Tour Diary

[Verse 1]

On our trip to England, I noticed something obscene

People still actually give a shit about the Queen

Though London girls aren't snobs at all

And Brighton's lovely in the fall

Left alone to drive ourselves on the opposite side

Man, it was a miracle that nobody died

Hanging out with Steven, Drew

Theo, Paul and Sorrel, too

[Chorus]

Eating at Welcome Breaks daily

We danced in Leeds with Brit Pop Haley

[Verse 2]

Performing with the Apples and then crashing at the Wrights'

Bitching because Steven booked us on such early flights

Always in a foggy haze because we haven't slept for days

Every single one of our London cabbies played

The most truly repellent techno music ever made

But they'll drop you without hesitation if you try changing the station

[Chorus]

Up to our necks in crisps and litter

In the van we dubbed the Gary Glitter

[Outro]

Oh yeah

I think I know...

I think I know what I need to say

Heart attack on the dance floor

Heart attack on the dance floor

Heart attack on the dance floor

Aquaman needs an antidepressant

Sorry, can I get one of those, please, please, please?