Letter to Blueberry

Awkward, this is awkward
I don't know what to say
I haven't written a letter
In about a year I think on the day

Your box is in my attic
With the journal I wrote when we'd date
It's weird now, years later
With my pen on a page

And though I know
We don't talk much
I've worked though all the trauma
And I really hope you're okay
And want to reconnect someday
It's obvious I've hurt your feelings
There's no excuse, I was unappealing
And you have every reason to be mad at me

I get that I've created somе scars
With the words I spoke and with my guitar
But I miss when wе'd lay under the stars
You really were so lovely
I don't fully know why we fell out
But I think it had to do with my mouth
I couldn't keep it shut and shut down
You had every right to leave me

I'm tired, really tired
Still not sure what to say
I don't think you really knew me
Think you fell for the me in your brain

And that's not fair for either of us
We deserve better
And I really hope you're okay
And want to reconnect someday

I get that I've created some scars
With the words I spoke and with my guitar
But I miss when we'd lay under the stars
You really were so lovely
I don't fully know why we fell out
But I think it had to do with my mouth
I couldn't keep it shut and shut down
You had every right leave me

I don't know why I'm writing this letter
It's been two years, I should know better
You needed some space and I get that
But all I want is my best friend back
I try to move on but with no luck
'Cause every time I pass you I get restuck
And you probably hate me anyway
But I really just needed to say

I hope I gave you space to move on
Please say sorry for me to your mom
And even though we didn't date long
You meant so much to me
I hope this song can bring you some peace
'Cause my other ones were not quite so sweet
We both deserve so much better things
Thank you for being my first everything