Chapter XI: Family Dinner

(Sister Imperator's heels clack on the hallway floor as she is dribbling a football. She then kicks the football into a room and it hits Papa Emeritus IV over the head)

[Papa Emeritus IV]

Ow!

[Papa Nil]

Gooooal

[Papa Emeritus IV]

Nice catch.

(Papa Nil and Mr. Saltarian chuckle. Sister Imperator enters the room)

[Sister Imperator]

Old star.

It's a celebratory dinner. Mr. Saltarian, Papa Nil, and I are very happy that you're back.

[Papa Emeritus IV]

Thank you very much.

[Sister Imperator]

You're welcome.

[Papa Emeritus IV]

I'm very happy.

[Sister Imperator]

M-hm. Good.

[Papa Emeritus IV]

Very, very happy to be home.

[Papa Nil]

Could you pass me the Bejing Beef, please?

[Papa Emeritus IV]

Sure. I mean, you want some on your plate?

[Papa Nil]

I'm starving.

[Papa Emeritus IV]

Yеah, well, you're also dead and see-through. I can put it dirеctly on your chair if you want to. You know, 'cause it's gonna go right through you anyway, dead man. So it's... Sure, what do we want?

(Sister Imperator and Mr. Saltarian chuckle)

[Papa Nil]

Oka, okay, okay no more. Listen, listen let's get to the point.

Sister, Mr. Saltarian, and I have decided you've just started.

You only did twenty-six concerts.

[Papa Emeritus IV]

Yeah.

[Papa Nil]

You need to do a hundred and fifty concerts and we've decided that you must do technicolor television.

(Sister Imperator and Mr. Saltarian nod in agreement)

[Papa Emeritus IV]

Wait, TV?

[Papa Nil]

Panasonic TV.

[Papa Emeritus IV]

Right, right, right. (Stutters)

That's cool. I can do TV. I can dance. I can act. I can sing.

[Papa Nil]

You can't act. I can act.

[Papa Emeritus IV]

I can to act. Look, that's just totally your opinion, dude. I can knock down a little bit of a, uh, an audition. An audition tape if you will. Then you will see what I mean.

[Papa Nil]

You go and make an audition tape. You go.

[Papa Emeritus IV]

Sure. I mean, I lost my appetite anyway. I'm... This is... I'll go do that. So, Sister. Saltarian. Dickhead. 'Scuse me for a second.

(Papa Emeritus IV leaves the table. Mr. Saltarian chuckle)

[Papa Nil]

I'm starving.