Lake Beach

(Spoken)

[MUDPUDDLE]

Lately it's been gettin' a little cold up north, but further south it's still, like, 90 degrees. Now in these parts we may not have the biggest cities and we may not have the oceans, but we've found something even better to do

(Chorus 1)

Drinkin' on a lake beach

Hangin' on a lake beach

Ice-cold beers

With friends we've had for years

Down on a lake beach

(Verse 1)

Butt-brown water only up to my knees

Down at the bottom there's three feet of leaves

Got poison ivy from whizzin' in the trees

Down on a lake beach

Slippin' on slimy rocks all day long

Off-duty cop is smokin' a bong

Big snappin' turtle just bit me on my dong

Down on a lake beach

(Chorus 2)

Hangin' on a lake beach (Kids sneakin' a sip)

Lake beach (Didn't know it was dip)

My best friend's wife just kissed me on the lips

Down on a lake beach

(Verse 2)

Five people that I know, 40 that I don't know

Everybody's phones at seven percent

Four pretty girls all got the same haircut

Down on a lake beach

Dragged my Yeti down a two-mile road

Every step I take I maybe squash a baby toad

Diaper in the water with a heavy-ass load

Down on a lake beach

My girlfriend didn't show up, but my uncle did

And he's not fun to play cornhole with

He's got weird gear and he knows all the rules

And he can't tell that that's not the vibe

(Spoken)

[UNCLE]

That one bounced off the ground! That does not count!

[SINGER]

Relax, man, he's just a kid

[UNCLE]

If he's old enough to play, he's old enough to know the rules! Take the bag off the board! That's how the pros play!

(Bridge)

[MUDPUDDLE]

Whiskey shot

Tequila shot

Wish I got

A tetanus shot

Fat guy in a tank with t-shirt tan line

Granny's big yams gettin' fried in the sunshine

Raccoon in the water, didn't know they could swim

Brought a whole lot of bread, not a lot of sandwich stuff

Three loaves of white bread but not any ham

One dirty toddler, no one's claiming him

Screamin' at kids not to swim that way

'Cause that's where the bats are

That's where the bats are

Stay away from the bats, don't go over there

Half of the lake belongs to the bats

(Chorus)

On a lake beach (I think I blew off my hand)

On a lake beach (Here comes the ambulance)

Rollin' down the hill, stuck in the sand

Claimed by the lake beach

On a lake beach (Turn a boy into a man)

Lake beach (No one picks up the cans)

Whole lot of lake, not a lot of land

Down on a lake beach

(Outro)

And the next day we all see each other at church

(Spoken)

[UNCLE]

Hey, everybody