What On Earth Is It (You Take Me For?)

I can barely keep the pace

As I bolt out the door

The watershed dissolves

Into families at war

The crude tube bogs me out

With a cucumber sandwich

Between the cause

And the emotional damage

What on earth is it you take me for

Is your ego doing battle with the ratings

Mocking the afflicted to the very core

Take responsibility for your failings

Matron!

Take the money

Open the box

The problem as I see it

And I’m not one to judge

But your void of compassion

Takes a dive in the sludge

What on earth is it you take me for

Do you judge me purely on the ratings

You bend me like a pretzel, now I’m down on all fours

The money box is open for the takings

Matron!

Abigail and Brittney perform the truffle shuffle

They are having a go in all the kerfuffle

Now don’t squirm in your chair

You are the sole director

So just pull the fucking plug out from its connector

Gawping at the dot

Disappear into the screen

Stand up to attention for your country and queen

Fellow brothers and sisters

Follow your instinct

Avoid being sucked into the prosperous jive

Take the money

Open the box

I can barely keep the pace

As I bolt out the door

The ninth bell tolls and its

Pussy Galore

What on earth is it you take me for

Do you judge me purely on the ratings

You bend me like a pretzel, now I’m down on all fours

The money box is open for the takings

What on earth is it you take me for

Do you judge me purely on the ratings

If I bend just a little further more

I’m likely to chuck up upon your failings’ railings

What on earth is it you take me for

Do you judge me purely on the ratings

You bend me like a pretzel, now I’m down on all fours

The money box is open for the takings

Matron!