Bitchin' Camaro

[Intro]

"Hey Jack, what's happenin'?"

"I don't know."

"Well, uh, rumor around town says you might be thinkin' 'bout goin' down to the shore."

"Uh, yeah, I think I'm gonna go down to the shore."

"Whadda ya gonna do down there?"

"Uh, I don't know, play some video games, buy some Def Leppard T-shirts."

"Don't forget your Mötley Crüe T-shirt; y'know all proceeds go to get their lead singer outta jail."

"Uh huh."

"Can't wait to go down. Hey uh, were ya gonna check out the sand bar while you're down there?"

"Uh, what's the Sand Bar?"

"Ah, it's a place that lets 16-year-old kids drink."

"Ah, cool."

"Ya hey, guess who's gonna be there?"

"Uh, who?"

"My favorite cover band, Crystal Shit."

"Wow."

"Yeah, they do a Doors show, you'd be really impressed, in fact, it goes a little like this:

"Love me two times baby

Love me twice today

Love me two times girl

Cause I got AIDS

Love me two times baby

Once for tomorrow

Once cause I got AIDS"

"Pretty good Jim Morrison impression there."

"I hope those guys have a good sense of humor and don't take us into court."

"Uh, what's the court?"

"Never mind that, the important thing here..."

"You mean the People's Court."

"Now, that's another story."

The important thing here is that we get to the part

Where you ask me how I'm gonna get down to the shore."

"Oh, how you gettin' down to the shore?"

"Funny you should ask, I've got a car now."

"Ah wow, how'd ya get a car?"

"Oh, my folks drove it up here from the Bahamas."

"You're kidding!"

"I must be, the Bahamas are islands. Okay, the important thing here is that, uh, you ask me what kinda car it is."

"Uh uh, what kinda car do ya' got?"

"I've got a bitchin' Camaro..."

[Verse 1]

Bitchin' Camaro, bitchin' Camaro!

I ran over my neighbors

Bitchin' Camaro, bitchin' Camaro!

Now I'm in all the papers

My folks bought me a bitchin' Camaro

With no insurance to match

So if I happen to run you down

Please don't leave a scratch

I ran over some old lady

One night at the county fair

And I didn't get arrested

Because my dad's the mayor

[Verse 2]

Bitchin' Camaro, bitchin' Camaro!

Donuts on your lawn

Bitchin' Camaro, bitchin' Camaro!

Tony Orlando and Dawn

When I drive past the kids

They all spit and cuss

Cause I've got a bitchin' Camaro

And they have to ride the bus

So you'd better get out of my way

When I come through your yard

'Cause I've got a bitchin' Camaro

And an Exxon credit card

Bitchin' Camaro, bitchin' Camaro!

Hey man where ya headed?

Bitchin' Camaro, bitchin' Camaro!

I'm drunk on unleaded!